WHEN you’re famous, you can demand what you like from a potential suitor. And with Lady GaGa being not-ugly and not-at-all-poor, she can totally decide what she wants from a suitor. So what’s she after? Someone who will treat her like a human being? Someone who cut through the celebrity icing and see the real person beneath?

Don’t be stupid. Celebrities want someone to absolutely and thoroughly buy into their importance. They feed off it. That’s how you get tough enough for the bitch-fight at the top of the pile (before it eventually eats you).

And so, GaGa has been asked about her dream partner. She likes them to have passion and ambition (two meaningless things, granted) but she still finds herself attracted to a wide variety of men. HOW WIDE? WE MUST KNOW!

“It ranges from a really big d**k to a degree at Harvard,” she told to The Sun. “[Plus] talent and perseverance and pushing the boundaries of love and acceptance.

And what will this brilliant person get in return? Someone who still lives with their parents like a big baby.

I’m not ready to buy a house,” she said. “It feels like marriage or something. It’s such a commitment, I don’t like it. I do love being with my parents but I also just really fear domestication. I just don’t have a home, I am 25 and buying a house feels a little weird.”

Nothing pushes the boundaries like owning real estate at 25.

Seriously. Sort it out, wimpo.

Google GmailYahoo MailPrint